I’m going to share with you an exercise that I learned from a good friend of mine back in college. This friend of mine, she had just gone through multiple relationships, kind of back to back, and she hadn’t been single for a while, so she developed this exercise in her life to sort of reclaim her own identity, and she called it “Dating Herself.” And that’s exactly what she did!
She went on all these little dates with herself. She went to the movies by herself. She got a massage by herself. She went for coffee by herself. She went to a restaurant by herself. All these things that you would imagine doing with other people, or maybe as women we’re sort of embarrassed to do by ourselves, she was doing it on her own. And for her, at this time in her life, it was really important that she reclaim her identity, and that she reconnect with her authentic true self.
Sometimes when we’ve been living for someone else—our husband, our baby, our family, our friends—we forget who it is that we are, what it is that we’re living for, what our priorities are.
Since you’re a mom, and you’re a busy mom at that, I know that you can’t just pick up and go on some of these meditation retreats, or some week-long excursion with your phone turned off where you can reconnect with nature.
I’m going to give you something else that you can do to reconnect with yourself, and that is, go on a date with yourself!
Go on multiple dates with yourself— not with your husband, not with your soul sister, not with your mom— by yourself.
Ask yourself: what’s been one thing that you’ve really been wanting to do? Maybe it’s the latest movie that came out that you can’t really find the time to go see with your husband. Maybe it’s just a night-in with Netflix and you want your husband to take the kids out of the house. Maybe it’s just a really long run, maybe it’s a hike in nature. Maybe it’s just a really long nice bubble bath. Maybe it’s going for a swim. Maybe it’s getting your hair done. I don’t know, but make it just for you.
The reason I’m calling it a date is because a date is something that’s usually planned ahead of time so I want you to plan this, put it on your calendar, and make special arrangements for it, just like you would any other date.
I want you to get excited about it, just like you would if you were going on a date with your husband again for the very first time. I want you to stay committed to yourself, don’t cancel last minute, and actually hold yourself accountable, okay?
For one night, for one afternoon, for one hour, someone else can handle the details of your life. I want this time to be just for you.
Share with me your experience in my Facebook group. I can’t wait to hear how you reconnect with yourself.
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